wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
