mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
