what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
