You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Randomize
