it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
