What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
