The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize
