hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize