In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
