People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize
