You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize