"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
