absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
