Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
