We're like a lot better than the average bears
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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