There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Randomize
