I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
