I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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