I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
