You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Randomize
