I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
