I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
