Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
No subtext here. People are naked.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
