I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
