WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Randomize
