I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
