i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
only if we run a train.
done.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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