I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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