i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
