two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
