he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize