There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
