Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
did i just pee glitter
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize