Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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