i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
