WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
