dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Randomize
