i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
