Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
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