and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
