Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
