I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
