your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
This is my gift to your gina
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
