You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
