census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize