this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
