This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
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