He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
