Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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