There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
