I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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