How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
